LOVE, VALUE AND THE THIN LINE
He did not value me and even I myself did not value myself enough. The more I stayed the less he valued me and the less I valued myself. I have learnt to value myself, and I have also learnt that sometimes value plays a more important role than love in relationships.
With everyone I met. With every strong words they said, I grew stronger. I drew strength from the words they said
to me, I drew strength from their smiles, from their kindness, from their belief in me. I started to see that people even thought better of me than I thought of myself. I knew that these people believed in me and I didn’t want to let them down. So with each day that passed, I made a decision to be stronger. It was hard. On some days, my heart broke all over again and I would break down and cry so hard. I would feel the pain all over again. Still I would pick myself up, wipe my tears and keep moving.
While I was in Enugu, I got an offer letter from my present job. I was so happy even though I knew I had to choose between the job and cutting my holiday short. Who was I kidding? Of course I was going back to Lagos.
On the day I was to return, I was at the bus park when a young handsome man walked in. I looked at him and thought ‘hmmmn cute’ and continued with my texting. After sometime, he came and sat right beside me and started to initiate a conversation. Once again in my mind I thought “cute but to be honest, I don’t have the strength to get to know anyone”. He kept talking and I just kept throwing aloof replies at him in other not to seem rude. However, I noticed that the few times I looked at him he avoided eye contact and I knew there was something about him. I would later find out he was a seminarian and it all made sense.
As our conversation went on, one thing led to another and my break up came up. Once again, he gave me his own words of wisdom but one thing stuck. He said “when God created you and put you on earth, He gave you everything you will ever need to go through this life. Do not be scared of anything, do not let anything bother you because you are well equipped to go through it”. Every time I remember that statement in everything I do, it gives me hope. It gives me hope because I know that I will pull through eventually.